I am still working on a artist statement for this as I don’t even know if I want to share this series or not. Here are some basic points about the series.
- The series is made with polaroid film, technically they are polaroid transfers made from digital prints.
- The series deals with my struggle of gender identity to some degree, I made this series before I came out as trans. It also addresses my feeling that I would never be able to come out as trans and my own internalized misogyny and transmisogyny. My fear, doubt and frustration over being trans are represented in these photos.
- I made this series the days after visiting my grandmother in a secure ward at retirement residence. She has Alzheimer’s and this visit I made this series after was the when she began to no longer know who I was. It was hard for me because my grandma raised me until I was 11. It felt like my mother no longer knew who I was.
- The work represents my growth as a person and was made from my old portfolio and reflects how the person I was when I took these photo originally was a memory to me when I made this series.
- Some of the subjects in this series were strangers, others were friends and roommates.
- Each image in this series is loaded with meaning, they are not meant to be read on surface value.
- In hindsight, I have some problems with some of this images. They reflect some of the issues I had to work through years ago for myself to grow into the person I am today.
- All of the images were manipulated with film and by hand. There is no photoshop at work here.